love lost

My friend and I were talking the other day about the famous quote “Better to have loved and lost, than to have never loved at all.” My friend said she would rather have never loved, and I said I would rather have loved and lost. I told her in one of my best emo lines ever “I would rather have loved and lost, because to have never loved, would feel as if my life was incomplete.”

To love is an essential of life in my opinion. It seems all of life is about love, in one form or another. To go through life without love, would be to not live at all. If I never was to have a serious relationship, I would feel as if I was missing out on a vital part of life. Being deeply in love with someone, changes your life. It is dangerous to put your emotions on the line, with the possibility of ultimate failure and rejection, but if it is the one that you truly love, it makes it ultimately worthwhile. Even if my love was likely to fail, I would still pursue it, for that small sliver of hope I possessed. Even in death, love would make life worthwhile.

Loss is another essential of life. It is impossible to live life without the threat and experience of loss. Everyone has, in one form or another, experienced loss, some deeper than others. Everyone, at one time or another will experience loss, around them and on a personal level. Loss causes the heart to weep, but it’s an unavoidable part of life. Ultimately, to love means to lose, for even if you are together for all your life, one of you will still eventually die, leaving the other behind. Yet, loss is a matter of perspective. Have you truly lost, to live a life with love? Have you lost, to never take the risk of love?

So when I hear the quote “Better to have loved and lost, than to have never loved at all” I think the writer of that, actually meant, to not have loved, would essentially be loss in the end, therefore it would be better to have loved and lost than to live life without love. Loss and love are two essentials of life, both are necessary for life and both cannot be had, without the other.