desperate treachery.

I've always said that in politics, your enemies can't hurt you, but your friends will kill you.
(Ann Richards)

There can be no friendship without confidence, and no confidence without integrity.

(Samuel Johnson)

After going through several setbacks and challenges these past few years, I have learnt to choose my friends carefully. I have chosen the option of integrity instead of quantity. On the contrary, I used to have a large group of friends and acquaintances, online and in person. It was a carefree chapter of my life. I didn't know being friendly and having many connections would jeopardise my own well-being. Maybe what they say is true; as you grow older, you become wiser.

I quote myself: Trust is like a Wonder of the world. Most of the time, it takes years to build. A sturdy foundation is the best defence when facing disasters. Alas, a catastrophe may occur to demolish even the strongest of towers. This, speak through experience. - Amalia Suhaimi

NOTE: (If you agree with me and would like to use this in your blog or wherever, please credit me. My words come from my very own imagination. Do not seek to republish unless willing to regard the creative rights of others. Thanks.)

It doesn't matter if I don't have as many connections as I had before. I won't frown. It's a celebration for the people who've seen me at my worst. Those who had my back through the hardest part of my life. They are the ones that really matter. Future connections would be sincerely accepted if greatly deserved. It's not a matter of selfishness but a moral condition. To myself, and to the ones who truly deserve my friendship. Here's to my loved ones. I thank you.

And as for some people, integrity in friendship is what they have yet to fully acquire.

Thank you for reading.

22.

HAPPY 22nd BIRTHDAY TO ME! :)

It has been a hectic week, but despite the shytes, I enjoyed my birthday time well spent with my family and loved ones.

And With you, I'd dance in a storm in my best dress.

whydowegetmarried?

If I was asked to describe the perfect vacation, it would be one spent with family and my loved ones. All the other attractions a vacation can offer pale in comparison to uninterrupted time with them.

Some friends of mine believe the perfect vacation is one spent pampered in a luxurious hotel with breathtaking scenery and a heated pool.

When you envision the ‘perfect vacation’ what does your imagination conjure? A luxurious hotel? Delicious food? Entertaining people? Interesting sites? The right weather? Beautiful scenery? The right entertainment? Some of the above? All of the above? An eclectic mixture of all the things mentioned?

Marriage is much like that vacation people dream (or myself, rather perhaps) will take one day, and just like people seek different components to create that perfect vacation, people look for different things in their marriage.

Why do we get married? What does marriage have to offer? How many of the things that marriage has to offer do we recognize and appreciate - especially if they are not part of our dream?

Communication, intimacy and companionship are three of the big draws to a permanent relationship? Money?

Lets put it this way.
A good marriage is the possibility of getting that dream vacation with all its components. Just as it takes a concerted effort to put the dream vacation together, it takes work to bring a marriage to their full potential.

Its never easy or ever will be, I see. But I guess it takes MUCH emotional, spiritual and mental strength (and a tad of physical too?) to slick your way through the many bumpy rides one can encounter.

If only we understood the benefits of marriage, what it can accomplish for us and how it can help us become a better and more wholesome human being the question of ‘why marry’ wouldn’t exist.

jyeay.

simpilcity. NOT!

Okay I have come to dust off the inch-thick layer of dust and a smattering of spiderwebs decorated artistically about this blog. NOT.

Don't you just wish that you could stop time? Not to enjoy the stillness of time but to figure out your journey in life. Where you want to go, what you want to do and how you go about figuring all that out.

Sometimes it feels like everything else around me is spinning out of control. Everything is moving, except for me. It's like I'm standing by and looking and not doing anything. You wish to run with them but you could never catch up. You wish to walk side by side, but you never could measure up. You wish to follow in their footsteps but the shoes were too big for you to fill in. You wish to shout out to them to wait for you, but no one hears. Everyone is marching to their own rhythm in life, whereas yours is just silence.

You tried running but it didn't get you anywhere. You tried swimming but you almost drowned. You tried flying but you couldn't even get off your feet.

Ok, STOP!

I update this thing so sporadically now it's almost retarded.

OH, OH!

As always, February is the month of luuurrveeee :)

ps: But of course, there are things to be gained from the shit that has happened.

Serenity, Now

Like so many other things, it started out innocent. But there was the scorching hot chemistry that was dangerously at its boiling point. And like they say, when all hell breaks lose, take cover. Or in this case, give in.

It went from simple innocence, to an all out rampage. For all those moments we've struggled to not give in to our desires, was finally allowed to break free. The initial struggling broke down the inaugural defenses. Which then spiraled into the almost desperate temptations that were pulsating from every vein and every nerve.

Due to the initial hindrance , it became an intense, desperate, almost dying attempt at salvation. To which was succumbed to. Finally.

I believe that 2010 is going to be a good year. *Cross my fingers and hope not to jinx it*. Seeing the stuff that are happening and about to happen, I believe this will really be a good year. The clean slate is finally here. I will make full use of it to right my wrongs. And probably for those who've wronged me to make it right again. But I won't give in this time, because some people don't deserve 2nd chances. Because some people don't deserve me. And this is exactly why 2010 is and will be a blessed year.

A word of advice, that feel good emotion, won't really last long if it's not based on reality. Because fleeting hopes never get anywhere, they just float around aimlessly, waiting for something real to happen. But no one should wait for something real to happen. You owe it to yourself to make it happen. Not for anyone else but yourself.

People are losing wisdom because there's this disconnect between the clever, clever brain and the human heart. So what are you doing to connect the two?

xoxo

tango with you .

If it's worth having, it's worth fighting for

Every girl needs a man; the kind that will treat you right as well as others; the kind that has enough respect for himself, family, and others; the one that will change for you to just be with you. The kind that searches for you with his heart, the kind that can be trusted alone with a room full of many other beautiful ladies, the kind that won’t cheat on you cause he knows he’s got all he wants and needs already, the kind that’s willing to be your friend and lover, the kind that doesn’t mind calling early in the morning to say good morning and late at night to say good night; maybe even sing you a good morning and tell you a good night story or talk to you until you fall asleep.

The kind that will do anything for you, even if it’s just to buy your favorite kind of candy. The kind that will defend and fight for you, the kind that won’t ditch you for his friends when you need him the most, the kind that won’t leave you lonely and wondering. The kind that isn’t afraid to smile to his friends every time you’re around and tell them, “She’s the one.” The kind that appreciates you for the things to do for him, even if they’re small gestures. The kind that actually thanks you for the little love notes you leave him, the kind that is willing to wait for you when you’re falling behind, the kind that will actually open the door for you, take you out on dates once in a while and buy you flowers cause it’s a Wednesday. The kind that notices your hair when you just got it cut or done beautifully for him, the kind that reminds you that he loves you and that he’s happy with you in case you forget.

The kind that kisses your forehead when you’re down, the kind that tells you to be strong and not to cry, the kind that will go through think and thin with, and for you, the kind that just loves you for who you are.

That kind of man, that’s the kind you keep.

da blues ..

"That's the most beautiful song."

"I've got a confession to make, that song was about you."

"I'm in love with you."

"I'm so in love with you."

1. ANGKATKAN BAG

Sebelum kahwin : Sinilah, I bawakkan beg u. Kesian u. Marilah...

Selepas kahwin : U ni. Leceh la. Beg sendiri pun tak tau nak angkat. Lainkali jangan bawak beg lah.

2. TERSUNGKUR BATU

Sebelum kahwin : 'Sayang, intan payung, you ok tak darling? Bodoh punye batu!

'Selepas kahwin : Jln betul2 la! Buta ke? Mata letak kat mana? Pantat? Batu tu macam besar pun tak nampak!3.

PAKAI SEXYSebelum kahwin : Lawanye u pakai baju ni. Seksi! Turn on I, macam nak gigit-gigit you sekarang jugak!

Selepas kahwin : 'Ni ape ni, tetek terjojol, nampak longkang! Dengan babat berlipat-lipat! Tak tau malu eh?'

4. MANJA DI PUBLICSebelum kahwin : Manjanye syg i ni. Cium sikit sayang! Geram I tengok nye pantat you!

Selepas kahwin : Oi! Org tgk ah! Tunggu balik rumah bole tak? Tak malu eh orang tengok?!

5. KEMPUNAN

Sebelum kahwin : U nak makan burger ramly? Ok, besok i masuk JB belikan eh syg..

Selepas kahwin : Burger McDonald pun sama pe! Jgn cerewet ah! Makan je!

6. KECANTIKAN

Sebelum kahwin : Cantik nye you hari ni. Eye shadow you lawa la! Berseri-seri muka you!

Selepas kahwin : Ape ni make up mcm tepung komak? Wayang pekji pun kalah tau! Bulan2 asyik buang duit beli make up je!

7. KEKAYAAN

Sebelum kahwin : U takde bnyk duit pun, i tetap syg u. Kekayaan tk menjanjikan kebahagiaan.

Selepas kahwin : Tu la, dulu tak nak blajar betul2. Skrg baru nak menyesal! Duit tong sampah bulan ni camne?

8. SEX

Sebelum kahwin ; Kalau kita kawin, hari2 i nak main dgn u.

Selepas kahwin : Eh, i penat tau! Ingat i robot ke? Gatal!

9. KESABARAN

Sebelum kahwin : Sudahlah syg, jgn merajuk. Sorry eh Sayang. Memang salah I. I ni matair tak guna! Jangan merajuk lagi ye Sayang. I minta maaf. Maafkan i eh?

Selepas kahwin : Salah you, you nak suruh I cakap Sorry?! Banyak cantik muka you! Dah buat salah tak nak mengaku. Tau nak merajuk je. Kau punye pasal ah! Tak kuasa aku!

10. MASAKAN

Sebelum kahwin : Sedapnye u masak (walaupun tak sedap)

Selepas kahwin : Mak u tak ajar masak ke? Ni Nasi lemak ke nasi basi?

11. PROBLEM DUIT

Sebelum kahwin : Syg, kita mkn dekat restoran mahal tu eh? Mahal takpe lah, skali skala...

Selepas kahwin : Mak oi! Peh mahal! Da la! Mee grg mamak pak kassim lagi sedap. Tak mau ah!

12. LUV PEGI LUV BALIK

Sebelum kahwin : Bye syg, I luv u too. Muaks! Miss u lah syg. (Padahal smlm baru jumpe)

Selepas kahwin : Ah, ok bye! Tak bole lah. Kawan i ade ni! Bye la bye la!

13. PENGORBANAN

Sebelum kahwin : Takpe Sayang, I tak kisah. I sanggup buat apa saja untuk you. I fetch you later eh?

Selepas kahwin : You ni, takde kepala otak ke yang I ni penat baru balik kerja. Apa salahnya you balik sendiri. Manja sangat ah!

14. JUMPA LAMBAT

Sebelum kahwin : Takpe Sayang.. Asalkan you selamat sampai

Selepas kahwin : Takpe. Da biasa da !

15. BUANG ANGIN

Sebelum kahwin : You kentot eh sayang? Hehehehehe! Cute la you ni! *cubit-cubit*

Selepas kahwin : Oi, asal bole kentot je eh! *pukul-pukul badan*

Credits to: http://fyzah.onsugar.com/home?page=3

As funny as this might be, maybe it's the harsh reality of relationships.