fancy grown-up.

I've been thinking about this for days -- weeks, even.

Am I going to stay and try to work this out, or let go of the whole thing and start over?

I've laid out all the pros and cons in my mind and I'm still just not sure.

Well, talking to a friend about it helps.

But in the end, I'll have to make up my mind all by myself.

Life's a bitch.

A Fresh New Start.

An impulsive decision over a long mauled over situation. Hopefully I won't regret it. Crossing my fingers and toes, I don't want to jinx it :)

"I agree totally that sometimes you gotta give away chances for the sake of others. Also, I respect that your commited to finishing what you start. Not alot of people I know can do that."

For once, have the confidence. Be a leader not a follower. Please?

Thank you to those who never changed and only changed for the better.
I'll always be here, my friends.
You have my word for it.

's ok.

Perhaps I should just rest for a moment.

Yes, things are crazy, yes, the world is going nuts.

Yet, deep underneath the stormy waves, there, in the core of my being, there is pure silence, pure love.

And ...
it's ...
just ...
OK.

what's left?

Can I ask you a question please

Promise you won't laugh at me

Honestly I'm standing here

Afraid I'll be betrayed.

As twisted as it seems, I only fear love when it's in my dreams

So let in the morning light and let the darkness fade away

I find myself preferring to look through the viewfinder to look at life. Somehow, it looks so much more beautiful through a viewfinder than when you look at it with the naked eye.In a way, it's like I'm using a camera as a shield. Hiding behind it. To prevent myself from seeing things that I don't really wanna see. Hence, I focus on the beautiful things that I can capture instead.

I wish for a better day tomorrow, and for everyone else.

I wish I would find success and fulfillment in my career. I wish to spend everyday meaningfully, with the people I love, doing things that I love and living life to the fullest. I wish to occupy my weekdays with work and my hobbies and I wish to spend my weekends for that much needed rest before a new week begins again. I wish to look forward to every start of the week just as much as I look forward to the end of it.

I wish to spend my time doing things that make me happy,contented and loving life so that there is no space for negativity and sadness. I wish to stop dwelling on the past, of what could have beens and what should have beens and move on happily. I wish to put every bad thing that I've been through behind me and let karma run its course. I wish to really believe that everything happens for a reason and that whatever I went through, has a silver lining to it, despite the outcome.

I wish to be so happy that when I eventually look back to my past, I will smile and be glad that it was all over. I wish to be so contented with my present that I know my future will be better and that my past will not repeat itself. I wish to be so thankful with my present that the past will no longer haunt me. I wish to learn from my mistakes and learn to trust and listen to my instincts. I wish to protect myself better and not be too believing. I wish to develop myself in mind,body and spirit for the better. I wish to grow from all of this and become the better and stronger person. I know I owe it to myself that much.

But after everything, I'm suddenly void of feelings.

Whats's happening?

Is it time yet?

ps: again, I'm calculatng what's left in me

b.slick

When the tide has come and gone, you wonder why it was even there in the first place. As the water level resides and you can see your toes in the sand. You hope that your footprints will never fade away, but as another wave washes it away, you realize that you are nothing but a temporary mark in this world.

You were never forever.

"Hope gives way to dreams.

Dreams bring you further away from reality.

The further away you are from reality, your feet are no longer firmly grounded. Then, the harder you fall"

I have officially stopped hoping. What's the use of hoping if all it does is make you lose sight of reality? It makes you dream of things that will never happen but then you still wish with all your heart that it will. Hope clouds your judgment and makes you lose all inhibitions. It makes you forget all your fears and you rush headlong without thinking. Hope makes you use your heart and not your head. It makes you lose all logic and sensibility, till you just do what you feel like doing. Instead of weighing down the consequences of your actions.Hope just gives you something to do, but it gets you nowhere. It makes you think of rainbows and butterflies when in reality, life's not like that at all. It makes you too optimistic, when you should be pessimistic. It makes you hopeful when you should be cynical. It makes you fall in love, when you know you shouldn't.

You know, it sucks.

where are you ?

... that when you were told time exists, you were lied to.

We have invented time to feel secure that we can predict life. That clock is merciless, beating out seconds at a constant rate, ignoring the natural changing rhythms of our minds and our bodies. And so we are constantly trying to speed up or slow down. I should Give myself a break for a change, - put away that watch for a couple of days and settle into my own natural rhythms.

over.

you tell me pretty lies.

o - verrr.